Fox Reporter Drills President With Questions About Fluffiness of Clouds
By MATTHEW MONROE

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Fox News reporter Sean Hannity stunned President Bush Saturday with a line of hard-hitting questions, the harshness of which caught the president off guard.  

Hannity started by cordially greeting the president but then immediately came out firing, “Mr. President, kittens: do you find them precious or merely adorable?”

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Sean Hannity’s crush on the president did not stop him from pounding him with hard questions.
A shocked Bush appeared rather agitated but began, “I... I... I... I think when you talk about kittens, it’s important to remember that it’s not about precious or adorable.  We just can’t afford to think of it that way.  Um…uh…the thing that the American people have to remember is that kittens are young cats, as I understand it.  So they need care.  A lot of care and…”

But Hannity wouldn’t even let the president finish his point.  He laid into the president with another probing, vicious question, “Mr. President, do you think clouds are fluffy enough to sleep on?”

“Well, they certainly seem to be,” replied the president with a nervous smile.  “That’s good enough for me.  I’m sure there's some type of evidence that supports my assumption.  Therefore, I think it's important that we act now.  We simply don’t have time to see if the cumulus cloud to turns into a cumulonimbus cloud.  So I say: every American should go out and jump on a cloud if you get the chance.”

Despite his love for the president, Hannity’s sense of journalistic duty would not allow him to let up.  He let rip with an explosive assault of journalistic firepower:

“Mr. President, why do the Iraqi people love us so much?”

Pow!

“What type of flowers have the grateful Iraqi people given you?”

Bing!

“Does the First Lady smell as good in person as she looks on t.v.?”

Bang!

“How were you able to respond to Hurricane Katrina so quickly?”

Boom!

“And are you for or against the murdering of adorable orphan children for sport?”

Kaboom!

The president was left reeling.  But Hannity saved his toughest question for last:

“Mr. President, are you yourself a god or does God just speak through you?”

The president was left stunned.  He appeared incredibly distressed and even more confused and disoriented than usual.  He politely thanked Hannity for the interview then quietly left the set.

It was quite a public blow to the president.  But Bush, ever the soldier, will remain steadfast. 

According to a White House spokesman, the president will bravely continue his gauntlet of a media tour when he faces yet another set of unyielding  journalists: the fair and balanced acumen of Bill O'Reilly, the sober professionalism of Anne Coulter, and the vicious journalistic integrity of Rush Limbaugh.

It appears Bush's greatest challenge as president may indeed lie ahead of him.